BAWW thread 2

MiloTime wrote:

I'm practically as close as it get's to aspergers, without actually having it.

I feel like that about a lot of disorders/social weirdness, I'm just really good at ignoring/hiding it
I used to have bad problems with anxiety, I still do have moments when I freak out but for the most part I've turned my 'giving a fuck' switch maybe not off, but to a 'dimmed' position And that helps with everything else too.

greg-the-fox wrote:

MiloTime wrote:

I'm practically as close as it get's to aspergers, without actually having it.

I feel like that about a lot of disorders/social weirdness, I'm just really good at ignoring/hiding it
I used to have bad problems with anxiety, I still do have moments when I freak out but for the most part I've turned my 'giving a fuck' switch maybe not off, but to a 'dimmed' position And that helps with everything else too.

one of my biggest problems (and one you all can probably agree with) is my undying pessimism. people have told me I'm one of the most pessimistic people they've ever met. half the time, I don't even notice it. over the internet, it's a little easier to spot, so I'd end up deleting my post, and re-posting with something a little more positive

you can't do that in RL...

blackfuredfox wrote:

I've cried more times in the past month than I've cried in the last 3 years. It hurts thinking about it, but I know just about what caused it too. Im scared to say what though because of my mind being overcautious around almost everyone. If you really wanna know, pm me and ill tell you, but if I don't, don't take it personally, I can barely trust anyone right now.

Whatever it is, if it was worth crying about at all, at least you could cry. I've cried once in the better part of the last decade, and frankly it was purely out of overwhelming stress than any genuine sadness. I didn't cry when either of my relatives died about 6 months apart from each other, when my ex-girlfriend died, when any of the famous people I really admired died (especially where I used to be a huge wrestling fan and it seems like everybody I grew up idolizing is dropping like flies). The last person like that I shed so much as a tear for was 2pac. That was 1996!

I don't at all think it's because I'm "more grown up" or it makes me "tough" or "stoic" or whatever. I think it speaks to something very rotten in me, or at least that I've lost something that a person is supposed to have. It's certainly not empathy because all those events hit me, and hit me hard.

That's what bothers me. It's like when you've been shot, they say often times it doesn't even really hurt, you just fall and bleed. I figure if you cry, at least you know it hurts.

Well, it's shocking, but I think someone's actually interested in me. I'm just so scared to make any sort of move, because what if she leaves too, since I'll be gone for a long time? Will I ever be able to hold a steady relationship?

No, I'm not doing online relationships. I hate those.

Oh man

So, I havent had a day off this week. Ive been on my feet, running around a store, hauling/processing boxes of merchandise, running shit around the store, tagging things, being on my feet for hours every single day for at least about 5 hours daily, today being 6 hours though. Im hired for part-time doing full-time hours every single week so far. So, Im fucking exhausted, and I get off work later than usual again, so I have to drive right out to my brother's fucking school right after work because I dont have time to go back home, about 15-20 minutes from my work, because my family is full of idiots who dont know how to solve problems like normal people. While Im waiting for the kid to get out, Im getting told all the shit I have to do when I get home, like cooking dinner for these ungrateful brats, then cleaning up after them/trying to get them to clean up all night, BEFORE I have even gotten close to being home for the day.

So I pick the kid up, drive back, Im nearly falling asleep behind the wheel because Im exhausted, I come home and just collapse on my fucking bed and fall asleep for about 20 minutes. I was going to go cash my paycheck today, but I was fucking tired and I was really not feeling up for it. So after 20 minutes of napping, my father calls me. I answer and he calls me and wants me to drive down the road to the bank to cash my check, then go to the store to find out about some fucking deal another bank is having with opening an account, and I know the process is going to take fucking forever, so I said, "I dont want to today, Im tired."

Then, I shit you not, in the most disgusted voice he could ever muster up, he fucking sputters from his fucking mouthhole "WHHHY ARE YOU TIRED?!" Oh my god. Just...oh my fucking god. He is lucky I had just woke up and I was so fucking tired, because I would have just fucking let loose on him. He hung up before I could process what the fuck he even said, and once I did I was pissed. Im still pissed and its been an hour. The kicker is, I MAY have gone to the store to find out about that bank deal anyways, but simply because he just spoke to me like me working everyday this week, having to deal with his fucking children, cleaning up after his children everyday after work, and doing everything else I do for him is not even a reason to be exhausted, he can pretty much go fuck himself. Seriously, that was the most fucking shit thing he could have said to me.

I go out there and get this fucking job, and now that Ive been working, and Im not getting days off, AND Im getting tired ON TOP OF still watching these brats and trying to keep his fucking house clean, hes talking to me like Im shit and nothing I ever do is going to be good enough. He says now that I have a job "Im getting an attitude". No. Thats not even close. Im not getting an attitude because Ive got a job and Im developing some sort of superiority complex or some bullshit like you THINK I am, Im getting pissy because youre talking to me like nothing I do is good enough, pretty much assuming my job is one where I sit on my ass and wave at customers all day instead of some actual fucking labor like it really is, and having to spend every fucking moment Im not at home with these miserable fucking children. I HATE these fucking kids. I really do. My brother is the most unpleasant little fuck on this planet, and my sister is a walking tornado of messes, and does jack to clean up after herself unless Ive nearly screamed at her to do it. My dad absolutely does not give a shit and backs up them being here even though he knows just as well as I do that them being here 24/7 is the worst thing thats happened to this house.

If he thinks Im coming off as pissy and miserable, its because I am. I hate taking care of unpleasant kids. I hate cleaning up after unpleasant kids. I hate having you talk about my job like I dont even have one. I hate living with all you fucks under this roof because I have no other options in my life to go elsewhere. I am slowly beginning to become fucking miserable every waking moment because of you people and you all fucking suck.

/rant

stop. trying. to get me. to RP with you.

JUST STOP

MiloTime wrote:

stop. trying. to get me. to RP with you.

JUST STOP

No. >:C

da fuq is it with male furries and long hair/ponytails? lacking the ability to cut your hair? or do you actually think it looks good?

I love long hair. Its not an inability to cut it or anything, I just enjoy having my hair long.

Kaizy wrote:

I love long hair. Its not an inability to cut it or anything, I just enjoy having my hair long.

there's a difference between this

and this

(over exaggerated by the fact that it's jared leto compared to an average dude, but my point still stands

MiloTime wrote:

Kaizy wrote:

I love long hair. Its not an inability to cut it or anything, I just enjoy having my hair long.

there's a difference between this

and this

(over exaggerated by the fact that it's jared leto compared to an average dude, but my point still stands

Im not into that "metal band length" hair, Leto's is more my style

Leto is one awesome fuck

Kaizy wrote:

"metal band length" hair

is that what you'd call it? yea, generally that look is what I'm referring to... it's just... awful

MiloTime wrote:

Kaizy wrote:

I love long hair. Its not an inability to cut it or anything, I just enjoy having my hair long.

there's a difference between this

and this

(over exaggerated by the fact that it's jared leto compared to an average dude, but my point still stands

SOOOOOO many furries are metalheads. And/or rednecks. So that explains it for the most part.
Also girlyboys

greg-the-fox wrote:

MiloTime wrote:

Kaizy wrote:

I love long hair. Its not an inability to cut it or anything, I just enjoy having my hair long.

there's a difference between this

and this

(over exaggerated by the fact that it's jared leto compared to an average dude, but my point still stands

SOOOOOO many furries are metalheads. And/or rednecks. So that explains it for the most part.
Also girlyboys

Well the ones with super long hair that are girly, you can usually pick those apart from the metalhead furries. Metalhead furries have really long hair, but its usually really frizzy and unkept from mass amounts of headbanging. Girly furries with long hair tend to take better care of it, so it looks more like girl hair.

Kaizy wrote:

greg-the-fox wrote:

MiloTime wrote:

Kaizy wrote:

I love long hair. Its not an inability to cut it or anything, I just enjoy having my hair long.

there's a difference between this

and this

(over exaggerated by the fact that it's jared leto compared to an average dude, but my point still stands

SOOOOOO many furries are metalheads. And/or rednecks. So that explains it for the most part.
Also girlyboys

Well the ones with super long hair that are girly, you can usually pick those apart from the metalhead furries. Metalhead furries have really long hair, but its usually really frizzy and unkept from mass amounts of headbanging. Girly furries with long hair tend to take better care of it, so it looks more like girl hair.

I want to get past the medium length where it's impossible for my hair to look halfway decent, until I grow it out long enough for it to weigh itself down.

otherwise my hair looks like.... well use your imagination as to how awful my hair is.

I gave up waiting, and got it cut yesterday

My hair is a bitch to manage at a short length, let alone letting it grow out. I flat iron the fuck out of it and it still ends up looking sub par.

Kaizy wrote:

My hair is a bitch to manage at a short length, let alone letting it grow out. I flat iron the fuck out of it and it still ends up looking sub par.

my hair is too thick and has too many layers to flatten it. I tried it once, and got a greasy/plastic look... fuck dat

I've never let my hair grow out longer than two inches. After that point, it starts to get curly, which makes me look sorta silly. Before and after that experiment in hair length, I've always kept it short.

MiloTime wrote:

Kaizy wrote:

My hair is a bitch to manage at a short length, let alone letting it grow out. I flat iron the fuck out of it and it still ends up looking sub par.

my hair is too thick and has too many layers to flatten it. I tried it once, and got a greasy/plastic look... fuck dat

I got layers, but mine always looks frizzy after flat ironing it

Riv wrote:

I've never let my hair grow out longer than two inches. After that point, it starts to get curly, which makes me look sorta silly. Before and after that experiment in hair length, I've always kept it short.

the worst part about my hair is, I'm not supposed to have curly hair, but there are specific area's that curl, which makes it look awkward as hell.

like if my sideburns grow out long enough, they curl up, and my bangs curl into different directions, so I can't part everything to one side without some of it curling to the other side.

it makes me want to give up on having hair

MiloTime wrote:

Riv wrote:

I've never let my hair grow out longer than two inches. After that point, it starts to get curly, which makes me look sorta silly. Before and after that experiment in hair length, I've always kept it short.

the worst part about my hair is, I'm not supposed to have curly hair, but there are specific area's that curl, which makes it look awkward as hell.

like if my sideburns grow out long enough, they curl up, and my bangs curl into different directions, so I can't part everything to one side without some of it curling to the other side.

it makes me want to give up on having hair

Sounds like you could have some epic old-timey muttonchops.

Riv wrote:

MiloTime wrote:

Riv wrote:

I've never let my hair grow out longer than two inches. After that point, it starts to get curly, which makes me look sorta silly. Before and after that experiment in hair length, I've always kept it short.

the worst part about my hair is, I'm not supposed to have curly hair, but there are specific area's that curl, which makes it look awkward as hell.

like if my sideburns grow out long enough, they curl up, and my bangs curl into different directions, so I can't part everything to one side without some of it curling to the other side.

it makes me want to give up on having hair

Sounds like you could have some epic old-timey muttonchops.

actually if I had to describe it, it would be more like a french woman who curls the side of her hair into full circles...

ugh god, I look like a french whore

MiloTime wrote:

actually if I had to describe it, it would be more like a french woman who curls the side of her hair into full circles...

ugh god, I look like a french whore

Sounds sexy.